Carissa Sammy

Today’s sermon by Timothy Tia really spoke right through my heart making it swirl like a whirlpool; so fast it makes my breath choppy and my throat chocked with tears as it threatens to flow endlessly right there and then. My oh my! It’s been a while since God’s word spoke so fervently and clearly that I could barely hold it all in.

Mark 8:34-37 (NKJV)

34 When He had called the people to Himself, with His disciples also, He said to them, “Whoever desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. 35 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it. 36 For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? 37 Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?

In fact, the same word wad written in the other main four gospels as well; some are as below:

• Luke 9:23-25
• Matthew 10: 38-39
• Matthew 16:24-26
• Luke 17:33

It really shows how important this verse is isn’t it now that many writers of the bible wrote on the same exact thing? It’s not like I’ve never read this verse before really, it’s just that today, when I read it again, it totally struck a chord deep within me. It like I finally am seeing the picture behind the glass pane which was filled with fog the last time round. I am finally seeing it for real and not just looking! Oh how it struck my heart!

He then shared the five things that we need to die to:

1.Dying to our sinful self – We all know what is sin. The first thing that were taught to us when we first accepted Christ or rededicated our life to God is to die to our sins. We know what sins are and we also know what God consider sinful when we read the bible and understand even more. Truth is, sometimes we disregard small small things to be sinful ie white lies, or gluttony or even saying bad words or having bad thoughts. We just choose to ignore and make excuses saying that these are not as sinful compared to those who kill or perhaps robbed a bank. But guess what? In God’s eyes, there are no greater sin than the other. It’s all considered under one and only category – SIN. Thus, the truth is, even the smallest sin is sin and though we are not perfect human beings, we can try to die to our sinful self by soaking our self in His words and His presence.

*Romans 6:11 Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin…

2. Dying to self will – Oh I think this one’s kinda hard. You know, everyone has an ambition; mine’s to become successful in what I do, earn enough money to buy a car, a big house with a garden and marry a husband who would love me and have the same vision and goal as me in life. Oh and of course, kids. Then probably, travel around the world! But what if, just what if, God calls me today and told me that He wants me to be a missionary in China and preach there? Would I then, let go all that I have and move on there just trusting in His words? I can imagine many of you going, “No way! Give up everything after working so hard for it?” My sentiments exactly. But truth is, I probably would. As hard as it will be for me with my parents probably against it wholeheartedly(hello daddy and mummy, just saying if okay! don’t panic yet! ), if God truly calls me, I would go. I would rather have a sense of purposefulness in my life than doing something everyday without any passion. And perhaps one day when I face the Creator, I can look into His(I suppose beautiful, amazing, breathtaking) eyes and know that I’ve done what He asked me to.

*Mark 14:32-36 32 Then they came to a place which was named Gethsemane; and He said to His disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33And He took Peter, James, and John with Him, and He began to be troubled and deeply distressed. 34Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch.” 35He went a little farther, and fell on the ground, and prayed that if it were possible, the hour might pass from Him. 36And He said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will

3. Dying to our false self and self sufficiency – In life we are taught to step on our two feet, grow up and be able to fend for ourselves; that is our parents’ main lesson for us so that we are able to grow up and take care of ourselves when they are gone. This is especially true in our Asian culture. This too we began to carry with us when we live our everyday life; trying to solve things on our own and depending on self when things get rough. When we have Him in our life, we forget that there is this Great God who is far mightier and that He is more than willing to carry and shoulder our burdens with us. We think we can, we indulge and get our pride from our achievements forgetting that in the end, it is Him who we should depend on, Him that we should surrender our burden to. Him, so that we can have our rest, in Him. Maybe, we can learn to trust our Lord more; with all we have.

*Proverbs 3:5-6 ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; ⁶ In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.

4.Dying to self-entitlement – Teehee! This one I must admit is very much me. I always think that I have done enough to deserve some things, perhaps good enough to be treated with respect, high class enough to not want to do things that people with no class does or something like that. You get the gist. Yes I am darn honest, enough to tell the world that I am in that category. I mean seriously, how many of you here never felt as if you should not be cleaning the public toilet because you are better than that or that you would so never work in a garbage truck company collecting rubbish every morning just because you are not that low of a standard. How many more says you deserve a spot in the public to be loved or that you deserve acknowledgment in the things that you’ve worked so hard for. Everyone of us things we are entitle for some things in life. That thought however gotta go. God has given to us everything in our life. A family. A friend. Someone who loves us. Money. Material things. Education. So much more. Things that sometimes we don’t even deserve and yet here we are demanding so much more. I have learnt today that I should be thankful with what I already have. That He has given me the blessings in life I do not even deserve and if He ever gives me so much more; then Praise God! I am in need to die to self entitlement!

*Phil 2:5-8 ⁵ Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, ⁶ who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, ⁷ but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. ⁸ And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.

5. Dying to self… So that Christ may live in us – Dying to all the above is for one purpose and that is so that Christ may live in us. I pray that as I begin to die more everyday, He will begin in increase in my life. Ultimately, there’s only one thing I want to hear, that is ‘Do people see Jesus in you?’. I surely hope the answer to that question is yes.

*Romans 6:11 Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

*Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.

*John 3:30 He must increase, but I must decrease.

******

Hope this touches and bless you as much as it did to me.

Have a blessed week!

Last Saturday, I had Northern Indian food at Pastor Tim’s place with the leadership team just sharing about lives and updating on testimonies and church plans.

Pastor Tim also shared about leaders reaching a point of life as a Christian leader where we will feel less passionate, tired and most distressing of all would be feeling stagnant. Honestly, I do feel more tired than I have felt for a long time and as compared to when I rededicated my life, I am definitely less passionate; not at all burning with the intense fire I used to have.

He then shared that when these happens, there are four key reasons to why one feels as such.

There are four reasons for Stagnation:

1. Lack of Devotion (thus making one weary)

Many people usually fall under this category. This is where people lack of doing devotions. It really is as simple as that. Sometimes we take for granted and not do devotion, sometimes we lose focus and are not discipline in doing them. I remembered my struggles when I first rededicated my life to God. I simply could not sit down and do my devotions every single day. It was truly difficult for me. I only manage to truly commit when I see the priority of God in my life and that I should be able to spend some time with Him everyday instead of wasting my time turning on the internet or reading a good book. Since that day, doing devotions is the time of the day I truly enjoy because that is when He will tell me what I needed to hear and I am aware that there is a true relationship between me and Him. It is also when my empty cup will be replenished again.

2. Lack of Compassion

Before Pastor Tim told us about these four reasons; I have already diagnosed myself in this category. I feel that I have dealt with so many different people; some with difficult attitude problem which drives me insane while others are just plain amazing and easy to love, and that I am running out of love for people. This is a very dangerous diagnosis I must say because when you stop loving people, you just stop seeing the reason of doing what you do because you just don’t love anymore. In fact, before Saturday, I have already kept loving people as one my biggest priority in my prayer list. The need to love is immeasurable. It is what keeps us going when people get difficult. It is what fills Jesus’ heart every single time before a miracle happens. Yes, every single time! So pray with me as I keep loving people as I go through this journey of my ministry.

3. God’s calling

Yes, this is also substantially vital in doing what you do. When you are doing God’s calling, you tend to not feel tired or weary. There will be passion and zeal doing what you do. So if you’re not sure what God’s calling is for you, pray about it. Try different ministry to see which one ignites the fire in you. Mine would be Campus Ministry for now because I love to see young people stand up for God, see young people burn so passionately for Him. That itself keeps me going on. Oh and of course worship ministry. I love singing. I truly do. But I love singing for Him even more.

4. Creativity

This I am not particularly sure or know how I can fit into this category. You see, me and creativity, we are like strangers meeting for the first time; not exactly best of friends! But creativity in doing what we do actually help grows through stagnation. It’s like giving a breath of fresh air!

What I learnt most importantly on that very day would be the fact that every single leader goes through stagnation and I am absolutely relieved knowing that I am not alone in this boat! It helps knowing that you are not alone and that other people goes through it too. So if you are right now in the stage of stagnation; let me know so I can pray with you and perhaps you can too evaluate what is your reason for stagnation. Remember, you are NOT alone!

Blessed weak ahead!

A diamond; yes you are...

Just came back from my Lifegroup and today’s topic was about boy-girl-relationship. One quote really hit me to the core; when you love someone, you give everything you can give and without expectations, because, the moment there are expectations, there will be disappointment and it leads to pain. So true indeed. Being in love means wanting to just give all you can give because you love. I really like that.

I also really enjoyed today’s class in school. My lecturer is really a hilarious person and he makes class so much more fun than it could have been! I am really glad! Oh, not forgetting funny classmates too!

Blessings.

I count them all the time. Small ones that makes life worthwhile.

As I doing my devotion yesterday, I reread the famous Psalm 23.

Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

¹ The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,

³ He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for His name’s sake.

⁴ Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

⁶ Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

When we first read about still waters and green pastures, we immediately think of the wide open meadow of lush greenery beside a cool clear lake. We are transported to a place that paints picture of peace and tranquility.

Did you know that when David wrote this Psalm, he however was writing from his own experience as a shepherd in the avid and rocky hills of the Middle East.

During that time, green vegetation was scarce, and water was so hard to find.

As a shepherd, David’s job was to guide the sheep to tiny morsels of vegetation that were sprouting among the dry rocks.

Honestly, the sheep depended on David totally for each bite.

Even the small sip of water that ensures the sheep survives; might only be a little puddle.

If the sheep wandered and didn’t stay together and close to this shepherd, they might not get what they needed to survive.

The words of this famous Psalm take on an even deeper meaning when you picture a dry, desert landscape instead of lush greenery.

Our lives often seem more like hot, dry places than lush, emerald fields.

Yet, it is during those desert times that we learn what it means to need the grace of God in every step.

With the words of Psalm 23, God is promising us that He will guide us to each new morsel of hope and each small pool of contentment, if we will only follow Him closely.

Grace makes even the smallest piece of vegetation seems like lovely green pasture.

The next time you read Psalm 23, try picturing a dry Palestinian hillside.

And remember that no matter how rough the terrain of your life, with the Lord as your Shepherd, you can look forward to His goodness and love all the days of your life.

It’s my second day of fasting. Truly enough, yesterday was such a roller coaster ride of a day for me. Not in terms of fasting but rather emotional being.

I had the greatest days with the boys and Uncle in Lakeview Garden just riding on boats, sitting on tourists cars and feeling and acting all childlike and touristy. It was pure fun and laughter; friends who you can be with without feeling like you need to give and try all the time.

Came back, showered and went out again for movies with these two guys who knows me inside out and are like family to me. Sherlock Holmes; not a bad movie BUT not a good ending either so I’m being skeptical but it is alright because of the good looking guys in the movie… cough cough *judelaw* cough cough… Teehee! And of course wonderful company!

The night ruins it all for me; but one thing for sure, I know who I can truly depend on. Thank you darling for taking me in and letting me sleep over and held my hand and took such great care of me! I am blessed. And I love you!

Checking self: sometimes, we just need to look at ourselves in the mirror and see whether we like who we are seeing. The words we speak, does it pierce and hurt? The looks we give, is it cynical and plain rude? The complaints we have, what about our self? Sometimes we need to do a self check up and see whether we are reflecting our Lord and God in character we have, the personality we show to the world. Are we truly acting like the ambassador of Christ?

Attitude check:

The Bible says,

“Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:” (Philippians 2:5).

“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off the old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds.” (Ephesians 4:22 NIV)

Most of us can easily identify bad attitudes when they are displayed outwardly in our words or actions, such a negativeness, criticalness, rebellion, defiance, impatience, uncooperative, apathy, discouragement, independence, presumption, arrogance, self-centeredness, rudeness and such like. These are examples of bad attitudes which Christians should reject. However, keep in mind, attitudes are inner dispositions of the heart and thoughts — they are the hidden intentions which will eventually serve as the basis for our actions.

“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” (Prov. 23:7).

In reality, no one else really knows the thoughts of your heart, except you and God. Consequently, attitude is something that only you and God can work out — a change which must take place inwardly.

Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy; meditate on these things.”

Our attitude should be love, forgiveness, consideration, caring, encouragement, kindness, humility, unselfishness, respectful, and impartial. (John 13:34-35, 15:12, Rom. 12:10, 13:10, 15:7, Jas. 2:9, Eph. 4:2, 4:32, Col. 3:16, 1 Thes. 5:11, Heb. 3:13, 1 Cor. 13:4-8)

Time to self check; are you the way you should be in His image? Good question to ponder! Hope all is well, blessed Sunday!