Carissa Sammy

Dream Catcher

Had fever Friday all the way to yesterday, the same day I started work and almost did not go to work but went anyway cos cannot afford to give bad impression. Anyhoo, it was bad. It’s been a while since I’ve had fever and such. It doesn’t help that the sore throat, flu and cough complicate my breathing and made my asthma so much worst. A walk to the bathroom made me pant as if I ran a mile or something and sweat started to break out from the skin everywhere. You want to know how it feels? Try holding your breath under water until you can no longer take it but wait for a few more seconds and then get up and you’ll know how it feels to breathe as if air is running out BUT imagine the air sucked in could not be absorbed by the lungs and all you can do is run to the meds for help. The high fever was horrible as well. Wrapped myself in 2 layer of clothes, long pants and blanket, popped in two panadol and try to sweat it all out. Wish I was home where I could be well taken care of without worrying bout such things. Bah!

Anyhoo, worshiped anyway today; with only one guitarist and a pianist and did so much mistakes! I could feel my face go red throughout! Gah! Surrendering to God; I did my best! I truly did! Am glad some people were ministered anyway! God is good!

*****

My new fav song! Thanks to Diana! Hee!

Part of the lyrics

Maybe I know, somewhere
Deep in my soul
That love never lasts
And we’ve got to find other ways
To make it alone
Keep a straight face

And I’ve always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable, distance
And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I’m
Content with loneliness

Because none of it was ever worth the risk

Well, You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception
You, are, the only exception

*****

P/S sometimes I don’t understand why people are not afraid to do it but go all mad when someone else found out about it. Seriously. What’s the catch?

One word.

Own up.

On a lighter note, I think now I know who are those who are real and not. It’s good to know.

All smiles!

Yours sincerely

I totally forgot what it's called ://

” A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one’s heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.” – Arabian Proverb

Thank you for being that kind of friend. <3

*****

On a lighter note, just came back from watching a movie with the housemates; Valentine’s Day. Well, went in with no expectations because so many people told me it was crap BUT somehow I truly enjoyed it. Perhaps it’s because of the low expectations thingiemabob. It was good. And today, went for an interview; there’s an exam tomorrow. If it goes well, I’ll let you know what it is alright!?

Going to class, meet the favourite boys(I hope) and do the test(hope it’s all good), swimming and then VIBE(cellgroup-in case u’re wondering); all to be done tomorrow.

Blessed weekend to you guys! I know it’s only Thursday but oh-well! Hugs!

What I truly need sometimes is just a simple girls day out. It was fantabulous. We talked and shared about life, our hopes and dreams, guys love and relationship and had many laughs over good food, amazing company, oh and of course, board games!

There was no one except for us

Some of the board games there

My girls!

What they had - Foot long sausage with fries

I had pizza!

Rachel and Philee

Desserts! nom nom nom!

WazzaWord - Our genius way of distressing! Think of extravagant words to score extra 50 points!

Winner is me! Hohoho!

Me! Btw, I'm letting the bangs grow long. It's too much of a hassle to keep bangs! I wonder how you people do it! Lols!

“A friend is one who strengthens you with prayers, blesses you with love and encourages you with hope.”

In the midst of all chaos, I choose to keep joy in my heart and smiles on my face. Sometimes it’s the hardest to do especially when thoughts are roaming around so freely landing on open spots. Ouch! Gotta keep my focus on what is right and what is important.

Hope that you, yes you, wherever you are, are doing well and is happy!

Last Saturday, I had Northern Indian food at Pastor Tim’s place with the leadership team just sharing about lives and updating on testimonies and church plans.

Pastor Tim also shared about leaders reaching a point of life as a Christian leader where we will feel less passionate, tired and most distressing of all would be feeling stagnant. Honestly, I do feel more tired than I have felt for a long time and as compared to when I rededicated my life, I am definitely less passionate; not at all burning with the intense fire I used to have.

He then shared that when these happens, there are four key reasons to why one feels as such.

There are four reasons for Stagnation:

1. Lack of Devotion (thus making one weary)

Many people usually fall under this category. This is where people lack of doing devotions. It really is as simple as that. Sometimes we take for granted and not do devotion, sometimes we lose focus and are not discipline in doing them. I remembered my struggles when I first rededicated my life to God. I simply could not sit down and do my devotions every single day. It was truly difficult for me. I only manage to truly commit when I see the priority of God in my life and that I should be able to spend some time with Him everyday instead of wasting my time turning on the internet or reading a good book. Since that day, doing devotions is the time of the day I truly enjoy because that is when He will tell me what I needed to hear and I am aware that there is a true relationship between me and Him. It is also when my empty cup will be replenished again.

2. Lack of Compassion

Before Pastor Tim told us about these four reasons; I have already diagnosed myself in this category. I feel that I have dealt with so many different people; some with difficult attitude problem which drives me insane while others are just plain amazing and easy to love, and that I am running out of love for people. This is a very dangerous diagnosis I must say because when you stop loving people, you just stop seeing the reason of doing what you do because you just don’t love anymore. In fact, before Saturday, I have already kept loving people as one my biggest priority in my prayer list. The need to love is immeasurable. It is what keeps us going when people get difficult. It is what fills Jesus’ heart every single time before a miracle happens. Yes, every single time! So pray with me as I keep loving people as I go through this journey of my ministry.

3. God’s calling

Yes, this is also substantially vital in doing what you do. When you are doing God’s calling, you tend to not feel tired or weary. There will be passion and zeal doing what you do. So if you’re not sure what God’s calling is for you, pray about it. Try different ministry to see which one ignites the fire in you. Mine would be Campus Ministry for now because I love to see young people stand up for God, see young people burn so passionately for Him. That itself keeps me going on. Oh and of course worship ministry. I love singing. I truly do. But I love singing for Him even more.

4. Creativity

This I am not particularly sure or know how I can fit into this category. You see, me and creativity, we are like strangers meeting for the first time; not exactly best of friends! But creativity in doing what we do actually help grows through stagnation. It’s like giving a breath of fresh air!

What I learnt most importantly on that very day would be the fact that every single leader goes through stagnation and I am absolutely relieved knowing that I am not alone in this boat! It helps knowing that you are not alone and that other people goes through it too. So if you are right now in the stage of stagnation; let me know so I can pray with you and perhaps you can too evaluate what is your reason for stagnation. Remember, you are NOT alone!

Blessed weak ahead!